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NEW DEBUT: Full Circle To The Truth Pt. One (NC-17)(4/4) AUTHOR: Des EMAIL ADDRESS: des826@internetconnect.net Disclaimer in Section 1 "Mulder...though it probably doesn't look like it, I wouldn't be doing this at all if I didn't believe in you. But it doesn't mean a thing if we don't remain true to our nature and to each other." "We're on opposite sides of the fence with this one, Mulder. For either of us to cross to the other's side without really believing would be betraying everything that we stand for, everything we are. We'd be working against each other, and the truth." "What do you want me to say Scully? Should I tell you you're right when I don't feel you are? Just tell me," Mulder said, raising his voice. "That's just my point," she shouted, trying to make him see, to understand. "You can't do that for me anymore than I can do that for you! What's more, I wouldn't ask you to! You have to be who you are and so do I." "And you think the answer is leaving?" he said angrily. "Leaving is the ONLY answer right now," she yelled. "It can't be a choice between who you are and me!" "But it CAN be a choice between who YOU are and ME, right? And I'm the loser," Mulder yelled, as thunder and lightening acted as a manifestation of the storm inside them both, and the sky started pouring buckets of rain. "That's not it at all!" "You said you loved me," he yelled. "And YOU said I was the ONLY one you trusted! Was THAT a lie," she yelled back, control all but forgotten. "DO...YOU...LOVE...ME?" He yelled, taking a step toward her with every word he spoke. "AS MUCH AS YOU TRUST ME!" "SCULLY, IT'S NOT A MATTER OF TRUST!" "AND IT'S NOT A MATTER OF LOVE!" "DAMN YOU SCULLY! ANSWER ME!" "YES! DO YOU THINK I WOULD LIE ABOUT THAT?" She screamed, tears now joining the rain drops rolling down her face. At this, Mulder lowered his head. The hell of it was he knew she wouldn't. Not Scully. And that thought brought him to the one thing he'd been denying all day: they were at an impasse. How can they get past this and still be who they were? How could they not? If he simply went along with her and followed her blindly, would he be able to look at himself in the mirror? If she felt this strongly about the situation, how could she let herself go along with it without losing her self-respect? They were each immovable. Mulder pushed down the hopelessness that was fighting to rear it's ugly head. Anger was better; anger didn't hurt. Damn her. Damn her for giving him his dream and taking it away. Stepping closer, Mulder leaned down so they were eye to eye. "You walked out without so much as a word. Without talking to me at all. Does 6 years mean NOTHING to you?" "I COULD SAY THE SAME THING! Look, I know I hurt you and I'm sorry, but there was no other way!" "There's ALWAYS another way!" "I COULDN'T tell you because I already knew how you would react!" "How the hell would you know how I was going to react? I thought you just said we didn't have any connection between us anymore! You're suddenly a proponent of ESP?" "I don't need ESP, Mulder," she said, stepping even closer and poking him in the chest. "We've been here before, or don't you remember what happened the *last* time I told you I was leaving?" And there it was. Thrown down like a gauntlet between them. The one subject they each have been so carefully avoiding since last summer, lest a spark that was started in a hallway of a small apartment building in Arlington, ignite into a flame so high neither would be able to put it out or figure out why they would want to. As the rain pelted their bodies, and the wind swirled around them, their breathing became labored, and the air crackled with tension. They each were remembering how close they came to heaven. Regrets filled them both that they weren't able to complete the promise of that kiss. Scully didn't even know if she was ready to complete that promise, and felt a moment of sheer panic. Fight or flight. But it was here that she finally noticed the position they were in. Nose to nose, with her nestled between his legs, and torn between wanting to move, and wanting to stay right where she was. Then Mulder made the choice for her, by wrapping his arms around her, preventing her any escape. "Mulder look, we're both upset and had a very hard day-" "No. No, Scully you asked a question," he whispered, relishing the fact, even through his anger, that this was the first time he held her in his arms in quite this way. "Do I remember what happened the last time?" "Every second," he said menacingly, softly, wrapping her tighter in his embrace, the growing fear in her eyes making his anger spike. "But you make a good point, Scully. This is the second time you've tried. Am I that much a pain in the ass? Or is it that you're just tired of being Mrs. Spooky?" "Mulder? Y-you know it's none of those t-things," she stammered, trying to calm her body's reaction to his nearness. Now that she had confessed her love and was in his arms, it seemed her body wanted it's expression too. And she was losing the energy to fight it. Was it so wrong to finally give in? "And how do I know that? You're the Ice Queen, right? You seem to have no problem walking away. Well, you can shed a few tears for auld lang syne, but after that we just change partners and dance, right? No hard feelings?" Mulder spoke cruelly, trying to hurt her - so that he wasn't the only one in pain. "You think this is easy?," she cried, beginning to feel hurt, then looked - really looked - into his eyes. And saw the truth. He was TRYING to hurt her. Like she was hurting him. < Oh Mulder, do you think I *want* to do this? It's hurting me too.> She understood him well enough to know how he would view her actions and her heart broke for them both. Every important person in his life betrayed him - with the exception of Samantha - but before he would blame them, he'd see it as something lacking in HIMSELF - something within him that stops people from loving him enough to do the right thing or to stay. How could she get him to understand that she had to leave, but that she wasn't letting go? That this didn't have anything to do with her love? In the end, simple is always best. "I love you, Mulder." "Damn it Scully!" he said angrily, feeling like she was rubbing salt in his wounds. "I love you." "SHUT THE HELL UP!" He yelled, grabbing her until she was standing on tiptoe. Mulder looked into blue eyes both suddenly at half mast and aware, and felt small hands slowly slide their way up his chest, past his neck, to slowly caress his face. "I-" "DON'T SCULLY, I MEAN IT!" he said, quickly shaking her before she could finish the phrase. Scully simply set her teeth and waited. Then tried again. "Mulder, I love-" The rest of the phrase was cut off, as Mulder ground his mouth against hers bruisingly, still trying to hurt her. Jamming his tongue in her mouth and biting her lips, grabbing her breasts, squeezing her hips, and then her ass. But Scully, set free and emboldened by the passion she was now able to give to him, was not to be denied. She poured her love over him. Made sure he felt it in every touch, every sigh, using her tongue to soothe his lips, caressing where he grabbed or squeezed, searching for those special places of pleasure that would make him moan. GOD she wanted to make this man moan. < My man> she thought, softly sucking on his neck and feeling desire whip through her at hearing his first faint groan. And they'll BE no changing partners either. He would know that too. "Stop it," Mulder whispered, sinking his teeth into her neck and moaning as she licked him back with love. Nibbling and sucking, she made her way up his neck, thrilling at his every shudder and groan. "I haven't even started yet Mulder," she whispered. < Stay angry. Stay angry.> Mulder reminded himself. She nipped the soft underside of his chin, then soothed the small bite with her tongue, nibbling her way to his ear where, again using her tongue, she gently traced the outer rim, before sucking gently on the lobe. "Dammit Scully, I said stop it!" he growled, grabbing her shoulders and pushing her away with shaking hands; filled with anger, pain and love. < Like HELL I will> she thought, stepping back into his arms with eyes open, as she stood on tiptoes and tasted the rain on his lips - tracing them slowly with the tip of her tongue and sending desire shooting through them both. She could feel her body softening, getting wetter, preparing itself to receive him, while her eyes told him how much she wanted him. Mulder looked into eyes of blue fire and felt anger and control slip away with every caress, every stroke of her tongue. < She's giving me no choice> he thought desperately < How the hell can I fight her love? It's what I always wanted.> And with that thought, Mulder gave himself what he wanted the most and for so long: Scully. Dana closed her eyes a moment as she felt his surrender and tried to resist, at least for a little while longer, her own; shuddering herself as Mulder rained small kisses over every inch of her face. She *still* had a point to prove. Wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her fingers in his thick, brown hair, Scully opened her eyes. Looking directly into his, she let them deliver the message: < YOU ARE MINE, MULDER.> And if it took a lesson on a dark, public, rain-filled, street, Fox William Mulder would know who he belonged to THIS night. She would leave her touch on his body and her taste in his mouth, and dare him to find someone else to replace them. And if Diana Fowley thought she had a snowball's chance in hell of getting anywhere with him, *she* had a lesson coming too. Scully moaned as she felt his hands slide down her back to cup her ass, fitting her against him tightly and grinding his hips against her in a mute plea for relief. Tightening her grip, she pulled his head down and slid her tongue deep in his mouth. As she felt his tongue move boldly, demandingly into hers, all thought left her mind as she was swept up in the burning needs of a passion long denied and a love finally free. Before she had taken the next breath, she'd yanked the tails of his shirt out of his pants, and ripped it open, running her hands over the breadth and width of his chest, over his back and shoulders, and wishing like hell for a bed - even a table - so she could feast on him. But that didn't mean she couldn't taste, she thought, as she fastened her mouth on his chest, lapping at the rain with her tongue then swirling it around first one nipple, then the other, making him shudder, aroused at the feel of him. He hurried to catch up, sliding his hands up her back and underneath her jacket and yanking her shirt from her skirt, frantic to touch her. He slid his palms down the soft, smooth skin of her back, up, then down again, unhooking her bra on the way, impatient with anything separating him from her sweet flesh. Anxious to feel the curves he'd only dreamed about, he continued his exploration, moving his hands downward past her hips, bending his knees, and grasping the hem of her skirt. Slowly exploring and caressing the soft firm skin of her thighs, Mulder felt a surge that went straight to his groin as he realized that his very proper and tailored Scully wore thigh highs. Each stroke inched her skirt higher and brought him closer to his ultimate destination: the heaven he knew was between her thighs. How many times had he thought about tasting her, swirling his tongue around her clit, licking and sucking, over and over until she came screaming his name, and then doing it all again. And again. Reaching her bikinis, he slipped his hands underneath them, hearing her pleading whimpers, and feeling stunned. She was so hot, he felt branded by her. Her hips were beginning to shift restlessly as her tongue swirled around his invitingly, enticing him inside - only to wrap her lips around it and suck. Hard. Pulling his tongue further into her mouth, and making them both moan loudly as each thought of her doing the same thing with her lips wrapped around his cock. Mulder rocked his hips against her mindlessly, as he felt her small hands slide past both his pants and boxers, making them slide down past his waist, to settle on his ass, matching his rocking hips with movements of her own. He was wrapped in the magic of this small wonder of a woman, who was sexier than any video, and as ferocious as a tigress. This was a Scully he'd only dreamed about, who was surely every man's dream. Sliding her hand around to his front, Scully closed her hand around his shaft, sliding her thumb around the tip that was moist with pre-come and desire. She traced the length of him and marveled at his size. He was both hard and thick. Soft and smooth - and oh so ready for her, she thought, and proceeded to drive him crazy as she pumped him - slowly at first - then with increasing speed. The feeling of her small, capable hand sliding up and down his hard burning length, made him moan loudly, and shudder violently. Abruptly, Mulder unbent his knees, gripped her ass tightly and lifted her off her feet; knowing that if he didn't, it would be over before anything had really begun. Scully responded instantly, parting her thighs, wrapping them tight around his waist, and rubbing herself against his engorged cock; a distressed whimper of frustration escaping her at the barriers of clothing separating them, though it was only their underwear and his pants, since he had her skirt almost up around her waist. Desperate and needing something to brace her against, Mulder slammed her against the door of the car. Using his body to anchor her in place, he ripped her blouse open, shredding her bra along with it and sending buttons flying. Hungrily, he clamped his mouth on her breast, closing his lips around it and tasting the rain on her skin. Flicking the nipple back and forth with his tongue, he used his other hand to gently massage the other. Sucking, licking, then gently biting first one nipple then the other, making Scully moan, and rub herself against him harder and faster. And then they were lost. To anything and everything except each other. Now having the car door to brace her, Scully shifted into overdrive and instantly went to work. Not thinking of anything now, but Mulder and how desperately she wanted him. Shifting in frustration at the barriers still between them, Scully inadvertently found a position that placed him flush between her lips and the tip of his cock directly over her clit. Tightening her thighs around his waist to keep him there, Scully thrust her tongue strongly into his mouth, and proceeded to grind her hips, moving that hard thick ridge up and down between her folds. Fast and hard and furiously she moved, the fabric of her panties providing a marvelous friction that egged her on even further. Mulder had stopped kissing her, and was panting into her mouth. Round and round she went, each stroke rubbing her clit, and bringing them closer and closer to orgasm. Mulder, who was indeed feeling his own orgasm fast approaching, was still frustrated. He wanted skin. He wanted to feel that hot moist heat made just for him. Grabbing a handful of the lacy fabric, he ripped her panties off and threw them to the ground leaving her open and vulnerable to him. Scully slipped her hands lower on his body to slide his pants down even more, insuring that his cock was free and securely nestled between the wet, slick lips of her passion. Both of them moaned at the feeling of flesh on flesh. As he felt the moist heat of her outer lips enclose the length of him, Mulder wanted desperately to slide so far into her that he couldn't tell where he stopped and she began. But this was not the time or place. All it would take was a slight shift of his hips and he would be inside her. And the temptation of that almost drove him insane. But he didn't want to do that here. He wanted to wait until he could take his time about it. Lingering over her, tasting, licking and sucking every part of her body, then sliding inside her and riding her faster and faster until they both came. But for now, he was fit snug between the petals of her womanhood, and wanted to finish what they started. He couldn't jump into the fire - not just yet - but he WAS close enough to feel the heat. The impulse to move was hard to resist - his body was demanding satisfaction. And judging by her arousing whimpers, Scully wanted that too. So, grabbing her hips, Mulder then used his cock to rub her slippery folds up and down the length of him. "Scully, my god, Scully," he panted, moving her back and forth over him faster and almost ready to explode. "More, more please Mulder," she moaned into his mouth. An animal sound escaped him, as he gritted his teeth, and moved faster. The tension was building...faster and faster...out of control and becoming unbearable. Harsh groans and pleading whimpers - like a dam ready to burst. A second away from ecstasy, they were an extension of the storm; harsh and wild, abandoned and elemental. "Scully," he hissed through clenched teeth, "I'm...gonna...come." Trembling and straining, Scully knew she was almost there and moved frantically, grinding her way to the orgasm she knew they both had to have. "Oh. OH! Yes, yes. Mulder!" She cried as the fury came upon her and Mulder covered her mouth with his own. He grabbed her hips and moved his own once, twice, three times, and then went rigid in her arms as he felt his body join hers and shudder with release, while Scully tasted her own name on his lips. Mulder tilted his head toward the rain as he took deep gulps of air and leaned heavily on Scully, idly wondering if he ever DID get the chance to make love to his partner, would he be able to survive her incredible passion. His legs were like water, his heart was racing, his breathing labored, but he knew he'd just had the most incredible experience of his life. Special Agent Dana Scully just blew his mind. Exhausted and trembling, Scully laid her head on his shoulder. "I love you Mulder, never doubt that." Mulder lowered his cheek to the top of her head and closed his eyes. How long had he wanted to hear those words? For about as long as he's been in love with her. Forever. Nudging her head up with his own, he planted a soft, tender kiss on her still trembling lips. "Scully," he whispered. < Ever and always Scully> he thought, while they stared at each other in wonder. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Struggling to regulate his breathing in the tomb-like silence of his car, the CSM fished another cigarette out of the pack, and lit it with slightly shaking hands, amazed at what he'd just witnessed. Though his view was obstructed by rain, his location across the street and Mulder and Scully's position behind the car, he knew what he'd just witnessed was beyond powerful. "That was quite a performance. Even better than I had anticipated. Now do you understand why I called you here tonight?" Diana Fowley struggled with equal parts of arousal and anger. She'd forgotten just how passionate Fox could be. But...shit! Had he EVER been that passionate with her? So wrapped up in nothing but what they were doing to each other? They were on a public street humping like a two-bit hooker and her john for god's sake! But she knew it was more than that. Had he ever cherished her and treated HER with the tenderness that he is so obviously - even from across the street in the rain - displaying toward his partner even now? < Damn you Fox. I'M protecting you! Not her. That bitch is getting in my way!> "Agent Fowley? Do you understand?" Slowly tearing her eyes away from the tender scene before her, She looked at the man who, at this moment, she despised for showing her the truth. Forced her to open her eyes to the reality of the situation. "You bastard. What is this about?" "Agent Scully will be a formidable enemy," the CSM smirked, fanning the flames, knowing she was steaming - exactly as he'd wanted her to be. "She's off the X-files, I told you that!" "Surely you don't think it's THAT simple, do you? After what you just witnessed?" he countered, staring at her in disbelief. "I can handle Scully." "Really?" "I've been doing it so far, haven't I?" "That's because she's been helping you." "Helping me?" "Unwittingly, of course. But arranging for a transfer out of the X-files tells me the little lady is smarter than we give her credit for." "I said I can handle Scully," Diana snapped back, losing her grip on control. "You can? Alright, why don't you tell me what this little exercise in the rain was all about?" "It was about anger." Sighing, the CSM shook his head. "I thought I taught you better than that. No, it was about territory. Rights. Ownership." "Ownership of?" "Why, Agent Mulder, of course." "What?" "Let's just hope that your hold over him can match hers. Even *I* underestimated how powerful it is." Diana, fuming, turned back toward the tender scene in the rain. So, Agent Scully thought she could compete with her? < Bitch, you don't stand a chance against me. I've known him for years, was a part of him way before you were.> "Interesting that he's holding *her* out there instead of you" the CSM mused, as if reading her mind. Diana opened the door and got out of the car before the CSM could grab her, slamming it closed before he could utter a word. < Shit> The CSM panicked. He wanted her angry. He'd wanted her to know what she was up against, but he didn't want a confrontation. At least not yet. But as he watched an angry Diana cross the street to the couple still unaware of anything else but each other, he knew he had pushed her too far. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX < Fuck this> Diana fumed, completely oblivious of the rain. If Agent Scully wanted a fight, she was damned well going to get it, she decided and marched across the street ready for battle. Ignoring the rain that plastered her clothes to her body so that they seemed painted on, she crossed the street and started down the side walk toward them. Two steps later, an arm snaked around her waist, and roughly pulled her into a darkened corner of an abandoned storefront. Reacting instinctively, she struck out with her hand intending to connect with her assailant's solar plexus, only to have her hand caught in a firm grip and her body pinned against the wall. "What the hell are you doing?" "Let me go," she seethed, struggling against him. "Feeling jealous, Agent Fowley?" he taunted, tightening his grip. "Well, too late," he whispered. "It was too late from the day she first walked into his office. Anyone with eyes could see that this was inevitable." "Fuck you!" "Stick to the plan, Diana." Enraged, she spit in his face. "You always DID like it rough," he sneered, wiping his face. "Lucky I'm a man that aims to please," he whispered, and crushed his mouth to hers, while she struggled against him fiercely. But as she felt the familiar hands roam over her breasts, hips, and finally between her thighs, she stopped resisting and melted against him, returning his kiss with abandon. "Stick to the plan Diana," he whispered, tearing his lips >from hers and walked away into the shadows. < I should have just taken her with me,> he thought. But it was too risky with Cancerman right across the street. He's probably wondering what happened to her as it is. No. It was her move now. He'd played this hunch based on years of intimate knowledge. So many years that she was one of the FEW people who could call him by his real name, though now he even makes his lovers call him X. It would be up to her, whether or not that gamble would pay off. And with that thought, X returned to his car and waited to see what she would do next. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX End of Part 1(4/4)